1. My wife gives sound advice. 99% sound and 1% advice!
2. My wife and I were happy for ten years, then we met.
3. When we were married you used to say that you would die for me. Now that we are divorced I think it’s time you kept your promise.
4. My wife keeps saying that I never listen to her… or something like that.
Note: those first four pearls of wisdom are from the walls of a bar in Belize.
5. Every man dies. Not every man really lives.
6. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth of the hole.
7. Alicia and Alex… loving you has been the most profound, intense and painful experience of my life.
8. I now fully understand what the term inveterate liar means.
9. Be truthful in what you do, what you say, and who you are.
10. Never betray your principles or force anyone else to betray theirs.
11. Happiness isn’t happiness without a violin playing goat 🙂